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| 木
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Maybe this is the best way I can release my stresses...
If you ask me how's my spring break...
I can tell you I went through a hell week!!!
Nothing happy happened to me, instead, bad news one after one came upon me...
Worst thing I would expect happened, my project from GM was terminated...most likely
GM is broke!
My professor of course, called me in for a meeting this Tuesday telling me this,
She is calling off the project too as she is no longer receiving money...
In another word, I am fired!
She suggested me looking for other professors, mainly she has no money/project to fund
me,
In addition, she doesn't like me, we didn't work out happily...too many problems!
I tried talking to my favorite professor, Dr. Loos, he really wanted me in however he
doesn't have new projects. If there is any chance, I really wish to work under him!
I found out another prof who is short of students, however he has the same money
problem too...I just hope and pray so hard that the meeting with him tomorrow is
successful and he will hire me!
____________________
I am feeling so stressed...damn it! I thought I could better control that...!
There isn't really anyone I can talk to, but so much appreciation to a PhD student, Mark!!!
He has taught me so many ways to solve this problem...
At the same time, I have to get moving on the class projects,
but I just couldn't concentrate and focus on them...for 3 days, I made no progress!
In addition, I am feeling so dizzy these days, no mood and not in shape for work!!!
If God wants me to go through all these to grow stronger...please give me the faith and
open the door for me when I meet with the prof tomorrow, I need this position so much!
I know how God likes to test me, always beats me to the bottom and when I truly
surrender to him, he will help me out! I am going through such training recently, but it is
just much struggle before it comes to the bright end.
Grant me the strength to move on and I shall overcome!!! | | |
| 月
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it has been a long time since i wrote in this place...
today i had a meeting with my advisor (the prof which i am working for)
she sort of blaming me for not doing any research work for her...
yes, i really didn't do any research work for her, because...
the truth is that she hasn't assigned any project for me to do...damn!
all these times i am only asked to find out information of this and that,
she hasn't really assigned anything for me to work on yet!
what makes me worse is the part that she said i have been here for 4yrs but yet i dunno anything about the professors here! right i really have no idea which prof does what...and why should i know that when i was still an undergrad?!
she told me to read every professor's background and finds out who are the students working for him...man, am i working for the CIA!!!
the worst thing of yesterday was that when she asked me to "start working" after final exams. yes, i will start after the finals, but before that, i am going back to HK for my christmas holiday...her face turned black after knowing that i am going home for the whole holiday.
WTF!!! does she ever expect me to work 365 days a yrs, 24hrs a day non-stop? are you kidding me, i need a break!
enough BS...
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| 日
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probably it is a good time to update my xanga again...before i am too busy to do that later!
this sem started off pretty free for the past week,
no homework, no quizzes yet...but projects are assigned already!
my senior design class has assigned a Kraft project,
I am going to create a new reseable package for them...
but as for the details, i can say nothing as i have signed the non disclosure agreement!
the group forming is still bothering us, we have 4 students from ME,
together with several other packaging students...which they haven't decided who are the dudes!
all our decisions and time line are hindered by them,
we cannot schedule phone calls and on site visit until we finally have a full team!
____________________
god has also created an alternative path for me, which is applying to grad sch!
here in msu, i like the environment and atmosphere, and i know here well...
but as for academic wise, i hope for better, such UM, Purdue or UIUC!
i am still struggling if i should stay here or climb upward,
for all the information i gathered, i am very likely to get all my tuition fees paid by the sch,
plus a little bit of stipend each month...this is too tempting, it is lots of money if i dun have to pay tuition!!!
additionally, MSU have waived my TOEFL and GRE requirements...which is a plus!
should i choose msu?! | | |
| 日
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it has been months since my last entry.
of course i do feel lazy and never want to write xanga anymore...more important i was damn busy for the past
sem.
life in the fall semester was horrible...i have 4 projects going on at the same time, with two of them are design
projects. but thx god, with his power, i managed to achieve all my goals in this semester.
2 design projects turned out having satisfactory results...one came third and one fourth!
now i am back in HK, avoiding the freezing cold winter in MI...and more important i can take some rest and
resupply myself before i head back to MI... | | |
| 水
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thx for everyone's encouragement, i know the reality...it is hard for international students to survive here!
but seems god is trying to wake me up by all these bad news,
today i received an email from the HR department,
it was calling for all MSU interns to a meeting to discuss the coming career fair,
and how we can help out in the recuitment!
what da hell?! 真係唔知囉景定贈慶!
why should i help you out if you are going to dump me?!
i will apply for a position when you come to MSU, but i will never help one who turns its back on me!
you got to be kidding man!!!
in the afternoon, everyone in the Electric Power Steering Department was invited to a celebration...
a celebration given by the leaders of the MDC, APC, AVC and ASC <--- i dunno want to type the full
names of these departments.
it was intended to celebrate the winning of 3 new projects!
one of the leaders said this: "the 3 projects we won will bring the company 300million revenue each year,
and the 3 projects will last for 4 years! this will guarantee future employment of all of you...
good work team!!!"
i am so pissed by his last sentence...another intern from MSU standing beside me, spoke the words from my heart! she was feeling very bad that i wasn't given the interview,
she asked me: do you work in any of the projects?
i said: i am working for the design of the Ford program...
she said: scew them!!! you did all the analysis for the program, and they are earning 1200 million yet
not willing to hire you?! you go back and mess up everything you have done!
i was actually happy to hear someone standing by my side, especially an american speaking for me!
____________________
my feeling is still "pissed off..."
i know i should go back to god for his comfort, i need his comfort to calm myself from all these emotional
downturns. | | |
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